Even now, when my supervisor is arriving later this week and I have an almost finished Chapter 6 – why, I’ve even nearly finished Chapter 7 and so quickly, there is still resistance to finalising Chapter 6.
I sit down at the computer in this now (this very moment) and say that it’s so close, it can be done. I know what needs to be done. The missing bits are neatly dot-pointed, awaiting expansion.
I have everything before me.
But I resist.
I am writing this blog post as both a distraction and an exploration of what this resistance is about.
What do I (the ego) want to do today? Hmm… go running, read something I want to read for a change, go to Pump this afternoon. Garden. Chill out. Cook.
But there’s my supervisor coming all the way from Canberra to see me and I said I would have the chapter finished and provide a date for the next one.
So what does my ego do? Engage in distractions. Play online, write blog posts.
Oh for goodness sakes!
Get a grip, Mandy!! Here’s the mantra: do 20 minutes.
Break it down into small parts. Do the work.
Just do it, girl!!!
Resistance requires a lot of energy to keep in place. A LOT! It can feel very attractive to keep resistance in place, because that’s alot of energy being managed, kept very close to you.
But its nothing compared to the release. The experience of finally doing what it is you want/need to do.
Like yesterday, I really wanted to go for a walk and it took me until 4pm to actually get my shit together and go. I’m soooo glad I did! Although my parents live in utter Suburbia, just scratch the surface and there’s a beautiful walk near the creek just a block away. The creek leads into a park with a lake and ducks. Big wide open spaces. Very nice. Hmmmm.
Sure, study ain’t the funnest thing in the world to do. But when you get it done, you’ll still feel better.
So have you done your 20 minutes yet?? 😉
Hey Svasti, thanks for dropping by.
I busted resistance’s slow and lardy ass, yo!!
Coming up to 1.5hrs of delicious thesis blah blah.
I’m on a coffee break now…
And after reading your comments, I am daydreaming of going for a walk. You know if I could have any job in the whole world, I would be a professional bushwalker. Or maybe someone like Peace Pilgrim… just walk and breathe and be.
Ohh… It’s going to be all over soon . I’ll have to wear a silly hat that simply adds weight to the insanity of doing a PhD.
Did you get Daylight Savings in Vic this weekend? I notice my mobile phone’s got the wrong time on it now, so SA must’ve had it come on last night. For good or bad, we don’t get it here.
Yes, we did get DLS and boy, does it seem to be getting earlier and earlier each year!
Changes in numbers and things like that are very confusing to someone like me who only thinks in pictures.
Glad to hear the studying is going well. Oy!